Patch News History

August was a pretty good flying month weather wise but the first Sunday saw us all gathered in the barn for some ‘will it/won’t it’ time until the rain moved on and we were able to fly.You may wonder why Steve Hastings (1066) has his back to the camera…believe me you don’t want to see the photo I took 10 seconds later!

We were all very pleased to welcome George Rose back to PAM after an 18 month absence, he said he realized he just couldn’t live without us. Or it may have been more like “Hopefully that Palmer bloke will keep his big gob shut this time”! What he actually said was that he can see way the club is going, partly because of the proximity of the new houses being built, and he has decided to make the switch to electric power. So George brought along couple of electric models, a Kinetic and a Devil 3D. The Kinetic is from HobbyKing and is almost identical to the Spirit mini glider that several of us are flying, little more than cosmetic changes and a slightly different spec motor. The first flight didn’t go too well, apparently George had inadvertently programmed in reversed exponential on the ailerons. It’s very easy to do, especially as on some transmitters you need positive expo but on others you need negative, you’d think the manufacturers would standardize such things but they haven’t. Personally whenever I set up expo I dial in about 80 or 90% and then check it’s the correct way, it’s easy to see if it’s soft or extreme around the centre with that much expo, then dial it back to around 30% or so to fly. Anyway after a little repair work the Kinetic is now flying perfectly, it appears to fly just as well as the Spirit.The Devil 3D is manufactured by Dynam and George got his from Sussex Model Centre. It’s an all EPO foam biplane that is billed as a 3D capable sport aerobatic bipe. It’s 1016mm span (40”) and is powered by a 3720 motor with a KV of 650 and a 4 cell pack. It flies really well and I think George will have a lot of fun with it.

Andy Smith also recently returned to us after a few months of being AWOL. Never one to do things by halves Smiffy came bearing an SU-35 twin 70mm EDF with vectored thrust and retracts! It’s a Freewing model and is pretty much a bolt together airframe, I think the nosecone is the only part that’s glued. He had done some taxiing trials with the model at the Guildford club and decided that it wouldn’t get off our patch so decided to bungee it off his ramp. He’s used the ramp successfully many times with his EDF Phantoms but the Sukhoi is much bigger and heavier than the Phantoms. It has a wingspan of 1080mm but is 1630mm long and weighs around 3kg.Smiffy tried three bungee launches, with increased tension each time. We put more pull on the bungee each time as well! I could mention trivial problems we discovered like one motor running reversed but I wouldn’t want to embarrass the plonker! It really didn’t seem to be even close to going off the ramp but felt as if there was lots of power so Smiffy decided I should hand launch it.In this picture Smiffy is in his favourite position, waiting for his mate 1066!It probably wasn’t the best chuck in the world but it didn’t seem too bad and the plane looked like it was going to get away but unfortunately all it achieved was enough height and speed to ensure lot of damage when it failed. Such a shame as it really was a lovely model. The good news is that a replacement airframe has been ordered. Not sure how Andy is going to overcome the launch problems so watch this space.

While I was messing around (helping?) with the SU-35 Nigel Baker was waiting to test his new ST Models MX2.I must have been engrossed as I missed it completely and Nigel later told me off and sent some photos, sorry Nigel! The MX2 is made from good old EPO foam, is 1210mm span (a tad under 48”) and weighs just 960g so it’s got a light wing loading and should be a good flier. It uses a ‘standard’ 3 cell pack of around 2200 capacity.I’ve missed a couple of Sundays this month so I still haven’t seen it fly. Does it fly ok? Does it still exist?!

Another new model I almost ignored was Phil ‘Wonky’ Wiltshire’s new Slick 360 3D, but I did at least take some photos.This one is yet another from HobbyKing and it has an all wood, very lightweight laser cut structure with iron on covering. It’s 1300mm span, weighs around 1400g and flies on a 4 cell lipo.

Dougal Entendre (Mark Agate) sent me some info and a photo of his Evil Pigeon, a ‘bitsa’ made from parts of four other aircraft. The fuselage is from the Easy Pigeon that he won in the club Christmas raffle, he didn’t say what happened to the rest of the model, he should be charged with failure to take due care & attention of a raffle prize I reckon.The wings are veneered blue foam and were made in 1982 for a slope soaring pylon racer, the tail is from Desperate Dan’s ill-fated Phoenix 2000, which he has beefed up with a carbon spar that came from the wings of his late Spad! Initially Dougal fitted a 35mm motor but it proved to be too much for the plastic fuselage so he swapped it for a 28mm one and it now flies very well.

Dan’s replacement Phoenix 2000 is a good flier, this one benefiting from a receiver that actually works! Last Sunday both he and John Wheeley were enjoying tremendous lift in the ideal conditions. Unfortunately I forgot to take any photos or details of John’s glider. There were lots of buzzards around to indicate where the thermals were and I tried to get some photos of both gliders circling amongst about eight buzzards but they were too high for my cheap old camera. These were the best two I got (on full zoom!), not sure but I think it’s Dan’s glider. As usual the buzzards treated the models with utter disdain and totally ignored them!

Norwegian Nick brought along a new/repaired model one midweek day.It’s a revamp of a small electric pylon racer Nick flew some time ago and this one has pink foam wing cores skinned in balsa and then glass-clothed. He’s made a lovely job of it and fitted a Mega motor.Sadly it was short lived, Nick said it was too twitchy on ailerons and result wasn’t pretty.

Steve 1066 has been flying another new model this month, an MXS from HobbyKing.It’s an unusual model in that it features a type of construction we’ve not seen before. We are used to seeing built up structures made from laser cut parts of light plywood which are then covered in conventional heat-shrink film. We are also used to seeing all foam models, often with a few pieces of stiffening ply where required. But this model has a built up structure that is then covered in printed EPP foam, and the result is very impressive, being ultra light yet strong. Unlike many EPP foam models the structure gives it the correct scale(ish) curves etc rather than being boxlike.

This picture is from the HK website, it shows the construction better than the photos I took. Personally I think we will see a lot more models using this type of construction in the future.

Steve says it went together better than any other ARTF he has assembled, everything just fitted perfectly. The flight performance is also very good and although he’s still getting used to it the potential is very definitely there. Fancy having one yourself? Well there aren’t any in the UK warehouse, and there are only a few in the European one.

A man is sitting in a plane which is about to takeoff, when another man with a dog occupies the empty seats alongside.  The dog is sat in the middle, and the first man is looking quizzically at the dog when the second man explains that they work for the airline. The airline rep said “Don’t mind Rover, he is a sniffer dog, the best there is, I’ll show you once we get airborne and I set him to work.”

The plane takes off and levels out when the handler says to the first man, “Watch this.” He tells the dog, “Rover, search.” The dog jumps down, walks along the aisle and sits next to a woman for a few seconds. It then returns to its seat and puts one paw on the handler’s arm. He says “Good boy.” He turns to the first man and says, “That woman is in possession of marijuana, so I’m making a note of this, and the seat number, for the police who will apprehend her upon arrival.” “Fantastic!” replies the first man.

Once again he sends the dog to search the aisles. The dog sniffs about, sits down beside a man for a few seconds, returns to its seat and places both paws on the handler’s arm. The airline rep says, “That man is carrying cocaine, so again, I’m making a note of this, and the seat number.” “I like it!” says the first man.

Once again he sends the dog to search the aisles. Rover goes up and down the plane aisle, and after a while sits down next to someone, and then comes racing back and jumps up onto the seat and craps all over the place. The first man is surprised and disgusted by this, and asks “What the heck is going on?” The handler nervously replies “He just found a bomb!”

Colin Cowplain

After my holiday last month Patch News was very late. This month I’ve got loads of material, partly due to the fabulous weather no doubt, and I’m aiming to get back on track so this should be online by 1^st August.
I’ll start with what seems to be an emerging trend, possibly a follow on from the highly successful EPP Mustangs & 109s. At the beginning of the month 1066 brought along a Freewing Spirit, it’s an 815mm span EPO mini electric glider described as a ‘warmliner’. That means it’s fast and fully aerobatic, but it can also be flown in a docile manner and it glides remarkably well for its size. It comes complete with four servos, a 2621 1100kV motor & folding prop, 20A speed controller, and even a second power pod to convert it to a pusher for FPV work. It’s around £43 in the UK and all you need to add is a receiver and 3 cell lipo.  The model info says to use a 450-500mAh battery but the 1000mAh packs most of us use in the Mustangs fit perfectly. I’m sure the slightly fatter 1300mAh pack would also fit. The wings simply click together, as does the all moving tail, and mounting the wing uses two screws. That’s it! Putting on the stickers really does take the longest time.
Steve had purchased two Spirits from HobbyKing, one being intended for a future raffle prize, but great interest was shown in the Spirit as soon as it flew and Dougal Entendre promptly managed to persuade Steve to sell him the second one! So then there were two…
I tried to order one as soon as I got home but they were out of stock at both the UK & European warehouses.  However last week I spotted they were back in stock in Europe so I immediately ordered one (should have ordered two or three, the £8 postage would have stayed the same). It arrived one lunchtime and that same evening I had four flights with it! So then there were three…
You may recall that a couple of months back my SportJet had a slightly vertical arrival whilst flying with the identical SportJets of 1066 & Dougal, a classic case of mistaken identity. To avoid similar problems with the Spirit I have cunningly applied the fin stickers differently on my Spirit. Some may think I simply got it wrong but obviously it was intentional… ahem.

I’m sure a few more will be purchased before too long, they really are great fun to fly.

There have also been a couple of other electric gliders at the patch this month; the great weather must have brought them out. One belongs to Desperate Dan, the other to Dougal. Dan’s is a Phoenix 2000 from HobbyKing, and it’s actually a replacement for one that disproved the ‘virtually indestructible’ claim when the receiver packed up before I even had a chance to photograph it. Apparently it went in very hard from a great height so it’s not surprising it was totalled. The replacement seems to fly very well and I saw it up pretty high on Sunday. It’s got EPO wings and tail but unusually, the fuselage is blow moulded nylon with ply reinforcement. For just under £50 you get everything except the receiver and lipo, although I see Dan has added the optional flaps which would have required another couple of servos.

 

Dougal’s is a totally different machine, as you can see it’s a proper ‘built from balsa’ glider to which Mark has added a small pylon that holds the electric motor. It’s an Olympic, which was a plan from the American mag RCM back in the 70’s and its 100” span. Dougal has added some sheeting and rib capping strips to improve the torsional rigidity of the wing. He was having problems with the speed controller last week so has now fitted a new one, but the plane flew very nicely anyway.

Smiffy (remember him?) reappeared on Sunday after a long absence. He was flying a Dago Red Racer from YT International which has a fibreglass fuselage with carbon reinforcements and an obechi skinned foam wing. It comes complete with servos, motor, esc etc and is reckoned to do 120mph straight and level! It obviously scares Smiffy as there didn’t seem to be much full throttle flying as far as I could see but it certainly shifted around very rapidly. Looks like a few minutes of adrenaline filled fun.

John Wheeley went right out of character a couple of weeks ago and turned up with an EDF F-4 Phantom. It’s a Starmax one and I initially thought it used the same motor and 50mm fan as my little Grippen but after some investigation I think it must be a 64mm fan version.  It’s 540mm span and weighs around 19ozs, uses a 1300mAh 3 cell lipo.

It went away well from the launch and continued to fly well although elevator control seemed to be an issue, particularly when John throttled it back a bit. He flew for around four minutes and got it down with just some very minor damage to the foam. Smiffy reckons that the nozzle angle on the Starmax model is incorrect and it needs some throttle/elevator mixing. He could well be right but it’s difficult to tell from the one flight it’s had so far. One thing that surprised me was that it had around 60% left in the pack after the flight, remarkable considering it’s a 1300mAh pack, so maybe John just needed more throttle! I liked it a lot and would like to have a go with it to see if I could figure out the problem. I took some video of the launch and some of the flight but unfortunately missed the landing. You can see it here: Phantom first flight
John also kept our attention by adding a small video camera to his Multiplex TwinStar. Not sure which camera it is but it seems to be good, has quite a wide angle lens and records good quality video.  I’ve uploaded some of John’s first efforts, as well as circuits around the field it catches Desperate Dan’s Wot4 Foam-e and, very briefly, my Grippen. There is also a moment of both Dan and I being stupid, we do it so well! It’s worth a look, see it here: Onboard the TwinStar
To go with his new glider Dan has purchased an Orange transmitter. It’s the first one I’ve seen in the flesh and it looks like a nice bit of kit for the money. I don’t think you’ll find another 6 channel, 10 model memory transmitter that has all the usual dual rates, expo, mixers etc for under £40.It looks slightly odd at first with its opaque orange case but I expect you soon get used to it. It operates on DSM2 so presumably it’s compatible with Spektrum DSM2 receivers as well as the Orange ones. Bargain.
John Reynolds brought another old model along one midweek day; this one is a Middle Stick. Some of the older modellers will probably remember the Stick series of models from the 60’s/70’s. As well as the Middle Stick there was an Ugly Stick, Big Stick, Little Stick, Slow Stick and no doubt several others.  John’s is powered by a Webra I/C motor, the plane is 55” span so the motor is probably a 40 I expect. Graupner kitted the Middle Stick but I imagine plans were also available from various sources, so I’m not sure of the origins of Johns. It looks nice and flies well.
We had a rare visit from John Barnard in July. John is a PAM member but usually flies at the syndicate field. I think he’s realised it’s time to learn to fly properly (that should wind up any syndicate members who read this!) and came along to see how we do it. As John Reynolds remarked “The flying part is easy, it’s the pits protocol that’s hard to get right!”. Anyway John B had brought along an electric powered model, the name of which totally escapes me. It looks a lot like a Hots from back in the late 80’s but I don’t think it is. Perhaps John will enlighten us.He had one flight which went well, it just needed a bit of trimming, but when he went to take off for the second flight there was nothing, no radio, no motor, nothing.  After a little waggling of wires suddenly everything worked again, not a happy situation. We did some more wire waggling and it seemed to be the factory fitted connector on the battery pack that was the problem but we couldn’t be 100% certain so John wisely decided to do a thorough examination of it all at home on the bench.  He was very lucky that the fault showed up just as he went to take-off rather than 10 seconds later, happily the model lives to fly again.

The Wot4 Foam-e is an excellent model but, like many ARTFs, the undercarriage does seem to fail all too easily. To be fair they probably aren’t too bad if you have a long tarmac runway but they just don’t seem to last long on a small grass patch. Desperate Dan kindly demonstrated the problem for us the other day.Richard King has suffered the same problem but has come up with a neat solution. He has used a two wire system to replace the original alloy undercarriage but what the photo can’t show is that part of the new wooden mount goes a looong way down (up?) into the fuselage. That gives a good area to glue and means the leverage that occurs in a heavy landing won’t simply rip it out again.

You may have seen that in the comments on the last Patch News Smiffy posted a photo of me that he had modified by adding a clowns outfit.  I was going to get my own back and went through the various photos I have of him but nothing I could do to any of them could possibly make him look more ridiculous anyway. But Cyano Steve had different thoughts and produced this little gem:
Good one Steve! 
Cessna: “Jones tower, Cessna 12345, student pilot, I am out of fuel.” Tower: “Roger Cessna 12345, reduce airspeed to best glide!! Do you have the airfield in sight?!?!!” Cessna: “Uh…tower, I am on the south ramp; I just want to know where the fuel truck is.”  
Colin Cowplain

As most of you will know I’ve recently spent two weeks on holiday in Cornwall. This means that not only is this issue very late but also I missed out on quite a lot of what actually happened in June.  So now I’m faced with a bit of a dilemma, should I stretch out the info I have got or should I simply invent stuff? You know the sort of thing: Multiple Models Montague failed to buy any new models in June, Steve 1066 Hastings finally cracked hovering, Burly Turley didn’t speak for three consecutive minutes… no I’m just being ridiculous now, better stick to the truth!

I’ll start with some info that Dougal Entendre (Mark Agate) kindly sent me. You may remember that in the May Patch News I posted a photo of 1066’s broken Extra, with Steve showing his pleasure at having his picture taken. Well the damaged model was passed on to Mark who made a beautiful job of the repairs.

However, apparently 1066 didn’t pass on his ‘slow and low high alpha’ skills and after only a few minutes the Extra decided to stop flying! Mark now knows that slow and low high alpha flight requires large and rapid applications of throttle at the correct moment, or the model just stops and falls.Unfortunately the resulting damage proved terminal for the airframe although the hardware was fine so it wasn’t a total loss.

Dougal had also suffered another loss earlier in the month but at least I was present to enjoy it! His little Spad had a mid-air with a larger model (I forget who so I’ll say it was Bob Hill, he seems a likely candidate).

As the Spad was so small and light it was bound to come off badly in any collision but it was a shame to see it meet its end like that.

Onto happier things now, a couple of new models had their maiden flights. First off was Viv Burgess’s with his new PT-19 (Boeing Stearman) from HobbyKing. It’s a PNF (plug n’ fly) so comes complete with motor & prop, speed controller, and 4 servos. All you need to add is a receiver and a 4 cell lipo pack and for under £90 you have a 1200mm span scale trainer from World War Two.

I can confirm it’s a lovely flier, Viv was kind enough to let me have a go. It has loads of power, more than is scale in fact, and will do all the aerobatics you could expect from a biplane trainer.

The second new model was a Splot built by Gentleman Jim Hobday. Yes built, from a plan, from real balsa wood!The Splot was designed back in the 1980’s by ex PAM member Graham Head and his original was powered by an OS20 four stroke, the latest thing in those days. Graham designed it as a quick and easy model to build, hence the unswept 36” span wing with no dihedral. It turned out to be a very good all round sport model and modellers started fitting bigger and bigger engines, the OS25FSR being a favourite. With an excellent power to weight ratio it was great for ‘fly for fun’ competitions and PAM members had great success with them. Sussex Model Centre even kitted them for a while.I had an electric version several years ago, back in the days when it needed a heavy 10 cell Nicad to make it perform decently. Since then of course things have moved on a lot and now they fly very well on a 3 cell lipo, which is what Jim’s uses. He’s made an excellent job of it and sensibly included a hatch on the fuselage underside to make battery changes easy. It flies just the same as the I/C powered ones always did but without the noise and oily mess. Desperate Dan has offered to run off some copies of the plan if you’re interested in having a go at one.

We had a couple of old timers turn up the field the other day… and they were both flying Junior 60s!John Reynolds model is powered by an elderly OS20 I/C motor and the airframe is covered in Solartex, very smart it looks too. The other Junior 60 belongs to Dave Campling and the airframe is pretty elderly but John has replaced the original I/C engine with an electric motor. The power train actually came straight from a Wot 4 Foam-E and it powered the model very well. The covering is original and shows the stains of its I/C powered past.Both models were controlled by 35meg radio which somehow seems more appropriate than 2.4ghz although 27meg single channel would be even better. Of course the original was free-flight but the addition of radio saves an awful lot of running around! It was good to see the models flying together…took me back to…well before I was born I think! By the time I started modelling in around 1962 the Junior 60 had been replaced by the Super Sixty and then, a few years later, the Mini Super came along.

Cyano Steve had a slight mishap with his large Velox early in June. As you can see the model suffered a broken fuselage but no doubt Steve will soon have it repaired. When a pilot pushes the envelope as much as Steve does mishaps like this are bound to happen now and again.

 

Control: “AF1733, You are on an eight mile final for 27R. You have a UH-1 three miles ahead of you on final; reduce speed to 130 knots.”

Pilot: “Rogo’, Frankfurt. We’re bringing this big bird back to one-hundred and thirty knots fer ya.”

Control: (a few moments later): “AF33, helicopter traffic at 90 knots now1 1/2 miles ahead of you; reduce speed further to 110 knots.”

Pilot: “AF thirty-three reining this here bird back further to 110 knots”

Control: “AF33, you are three miles to touchdown, helicopter traffic now 1 mile ahead of you; reduce speed to 90 knots”

Pilot (a little miffed): “Sir, do you know what the stall speed of this here C-130 is?”

Control: “No, but if you ask your co-pilot, he can probably tell you.”

Colin Cowplain

 

May was quite a busy month although I didn’t manage to get to the patch much midweek so I’m a bit short of pics etc.  The weather was variable but there were plenty of flyable days and members made the most of them.

17^th May saw lots of us heading to the Blackbushe Model Air Show in perfect conditions. Personally I didn’t feel it was as good as previous years, due in part to the absence of Ali & the Bishops with their Red Arrows Hawks, and also because there were an awful lot of crashes/incidents.  The most notable crash was the show opener Steve Carr with his new 60% scale Extra which suffered severe flutter about 45 seconds into the flight followed by structural failure, the whole flight lasting under a minute.  I know little about the LMA inspection system or pre display flight tests but I do know that crashes like that should never happen. Apart from that I think we all enjoyed the day and there were some lovely models present.

One of my favourites was Steve Holland’s large OV-10 Bronco, I didn’t get any details but it’s big and flew beautifully.

Another was this Viperjet, yes it’s scale, you can buy a real one from the manufacturers Dan & Scott Hanchette,  although you’ll need about half a million dollars and 3500 thousand hours as it’s a kit build!

Nick Squire took loads of photos during the day so no doubt he’ll be doing a full write-up shortly.

Not too many new models appeared this month but Dougal Entendre (Mark Agate) brought along a Radjet 800. It’s not actually new, it was previously owned by one of Mark’s work colleagues. Chris Hard also has a Radjet 800 and Mark’s seems to fly just as well. It’s very smooth, fast, quiet, and a good all round performer.

Desperate Dan has got another DLG (Discus Launch Glider). No details I’m afraid but I’m happy to report that it’s an impressive performer, several flights I watched were around the one minute mark and that was on a day when there didn’t seem to be any thermal activity. Not too sure what he’s doing here!

I managed to inadvertently provide lots of amusement a couple of Sundays ago:  Dougal, 1066, and I decided to fly our identical Sportjets together.  We managed to get nice and close on a downwind run and began a fairly tight turn back to do a low level run over the patch. As we turned I waggled my wings to make sure I was flying the correct model and carried on in the turn. Within a few seconds I saw one of the models dive straight into the deck and I shrieked with laughter shouting “Who was that?!”  Within a couple of seconds the remaining two Sportjets shot past us and I thought “Mine looks much cleaner than when I launched it…”.  Then I heard Mark & Steve laughing and the realisation dawned… somehow I’d managed to switch models.  The resulting wreckage was not pretty but at first glance all the hardware seems to have survived without damage. I’ve had several hundred flights with it and it was certainly getting pretty tatty and grubby (white foam and a grass patch with sheep or cow poo don’t really mix too well) so I wasn’t really too upset at its loss, and at least it gave everybody present a good laugh! As always on such occasions plenty of ‘kind friends’ were eager to help out with photos of the wreckage, these were donated by Dougal Entendre…

Viv burgess turned up last Sunday with a huge new model, a lovely Seagull Models Ercoupe. It has a wingspan of 2.5M (98.4”) and is designed for a 33-40cc I/C engine but Viv has converted it to electric and is using a 10 cell pack feeding a monstrous motor via 120A speed controller.  I forget what motor he is using but it’s producing over 2kW of power which should be more than enough for a model weighing in at around 15lbs. Sadly our small patch didn’t seem to be big enough to enable the Ercoupe to take off and Viv is having to think again about CG, elevator movement etc.  To me there seemed to be an awful lot of weight on the nose wheel although the CG appeared to be correct. I thought it seemed to build up enough speed to take-off so I don’t think the problem was lack of power. I’m sure Viv will sort it and all will be fine eventually, it’s certainly a beautiful and impressive model, one of those that just looks like it should be a lovely flier.

The other new model to arrive was Woody’s Yak-9, a VQ model designed for either electric or I/C power. It looks absolutely stunning in its two tone blue camouflage scheme and Woody has fitted the optional retracts to make it totally authentic.   It’s powered by the recommended 5 cells but the model came out nose heavy so Woody had to alter the battery mount to allow it to slide back further under the canopy to correct it.  He obviously got it right as it flew beautifully and certainly had more than enough power. There was a vibration when I went to full throttle which I initially thought was probably an out of balance spinner, but it gradually got worse as the flight continued so I decided an early landing was required. That meant I didn’t get a chance to check out the slow speed handling or the stall so it came it a little bit rapidly and both the oleo legs snapped. When we examined them it was apparent that they were very weak at the pivot point and I think if Woody can fit solid legs into the retract units all will be fine. The vibration turned out to be a loose motor mount, in fact by the time I got the plane down it was very loose, almost hanging off, but nothing that isn’t easily sorted. I was very impressed by the way it flew and I look forward to the next flight. Nice one Woody.

Thanks go to John Wheeley for this months’ tale:

His request approved, the CNN News photographer quickly used a cell phone to call the local airport to charter a flight. He was told a twin-engine plane would be waiting for him at the airport.

Arriving at the airfield, he spotted a plane warming up outside a hanger. He jumped in with his bag, slammed the door shut, and shouted, ‘Let’s go’. 

The pilot taxied out, swung the plane into the wind and took off.

 Once in the air, the photographer instructed the pilot, ‘Fly over the valley and make low passes so I can take pictures of the fires on the hillsides.’

‘Why?’ asked the pilot. ‘Because I’m a photographer for CNN’, he responded, ‘and I need to get some close up shots.’

The pilot was strangely silent for a moment, finally he stammered, ‘So, what you’re telling me, is …. You’re NOT my flight instructor?’

Colin Cowplain